1. |
poisoned!
03:00
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i never thought i'd be the type
never thought i'd be the type to fall in love
i never thought it would be you
never thought it would be you i fall in love with
but there's something riding in my bones
some kind of magnetic attraction
(in all those teen movies the concept seemed so distant
it didn't cross my mind that maybe it was real)
and if i'm not careful
if i'm not careful i could tear myself apart
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2. |
miniature devil
02:46
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i wanna tell you
but i don't know what you like
and there's a miniature devil in the back of my head
waiting to mess up my lines
i wanna take you on a date
and have a nice time
standing in the hallway with people shadows passin'
i live to see your smile
am i someone else (you're always gonna be yourself)
am i somewhere else (you're never gonna leave yourself)
sometimes it feels like (nothing's real anyway)
at any moment (everything could fade away)
i wanna see my friends (i wanna see myself erased)
but i never get the chance (filling up with empty space)
will what i'm doing now (in ten years carry any weight)
can i do something else
let's talk about god
let's not talk about god
let's talk about god
let's not talk about god
let's talk about god
let's not talk about god
let's talk about god
let's not talk about god
let's talk about god
let's not talk about god
let's talk about god
let's not talk about god
let's talk about
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3. |
the tide
04:29
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what if this is love i'm feeling
and you're romantically appealing
doesn't matter, i'd love to see you anyway
i lost my breath closing your door
cause all i want's to know you more
can we get together? your heart's what i've been living for
i couldn't move
couldn't do anything without you
except for wanting to have fun and not knowing how to
i'll say love a lot
and pretend that i've known its graces
but you can tell the liars by the looks upon their faces
it's always been lust to which kingdoms fell
but only a cynic could think other souls are hell
ignoring the love that in us does dwell
a piece of gold inside a conscious ossified
nothing can ever satisfy
the gaping hole in the loveless and petrified
like the purple touch of the cast aside
by friends they are deplumed colliding in their rooms
a fumbling conversational neophyte
stumbling blind from your halo of neon light
like a moth to a lamp in the dead of night
all that it could do is draw me close to you
the wind comes to snap power lines and topple trees
oh come on, destroy the scenery
what am i waiting for?
what am i waiting for?
when the tide wash me up
when the tide wash me up
when the tide wash me up
when the tide wash me up
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4. |
cross yr heart
09:24
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hey
its been a long time since we talked
i just want to clear the air
and express i guess how i feel
um about you in particular
(you in particular)
i've been looking for the words for a while
but it doesn't seem like they'll be coming anytime soon
so maybe once i have stated my case
you can take your hands off my neck
sometimes i wish i were somewhere else and
sometimes i wish i were right at home with you
everybody wants to be loved and
if they don't they're not being true
that's just the way that we are
made from the dust of the earth and the light of the stars
and i can see the shine from you whenever i look
i do
you know
that i love you
i do
you know
that i love you
i do (yes i do)
you know (do you know)
that i love you
i go on (living)
and i try (all the time)
cause i love you
when you come into my house
take off your shoes
take off your jacket
take off your hat
i am sorry for the dust that hangs around
sometimes it makes a heavy cloud
and holds me down
every little piece of media
on the tv screen or in a book
told me love was something everybody needs
but they forgot to tell me how to take it
or help me learn how not to break it
or how to tell you that i don't want to forsake it
without you
i never saw a blue sky til the day you came into my life
i saw your face and never saw another
like no other
i do
you know
that i love you
i do
you know
that i love you
i do
you know
that i love you
i do
i do
you know
that i love you
i do
you know
that i love you
i do
you know
that i love love love
i love you i love you i love you i ah yaaaaaaaa
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5. |
green apple
04:45
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falling asleep at my desk again
waiting on today to end
so it can just be you and me
with no bodies, our souls are free
when you smile is there
something behind it or
is it just unreal?
'cause when i smile its
not insincere, just
not everything i feel
when i think about being with you
i can't touch the ground
so if you ever want to see me
that's why i'm not around
we hate our bodies
(we hate our minds)
there's never time
(to sit and whine)
i'll make this short
(my words are light)
you gotta know its you
(it's you i like)
do you still want to see
north carolina
cause i'd still love to
i'll make time
take a vacation
no exasperation
just feelin' fine
i want to see you
bathed in sunlight
natural halo
your glow looks right
and its just a dream now
but that's alright
i might not ask you
i might
we hate our bodies
there's never time
i'll make this short
you gotta know its you
it's you i like
we hate our bodies
(we hate our minds)
there's never time
(to sit and whine)
i'll make this short
(my words are light)
you gotta know its you
(it's you i like)
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6. |
||||
i've had this old house for a while
but its fallen into disrepair over time because
i don't maintain and upkeep
i don't consider it to be
worth my time and energy to keep it clean
and i showed you the house
you went out and bought paint and nails and a broom and mop
we went through the house and swept out the cobwebs
painted the rooms in new colors and fixed the holes in the walls
the most important step to fix the house
was repainting the outside and cutting the lawn
so that it matched what was living and breathing
and spending time with friends on the inside
i like you cause you could see
there was something worthwhile in that old wreck of a house
you saw it because you had a house of your own
and you did a great job of fixing up yours
now when i'm in the halls or the kitchen
or reading or watching tv or doing yard work or something
i see what we've done together, what you did for me
and i'm reminded of how much i like to spend my time with you
and i wanted to ask
whenever you're available or whenever you want to
if you wanted to come by and we could just be us
together and alone for a while
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7. |
little girl
03:30
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dreamin of life performing on the road
playing music, never getting old
a siren with a voice like a harp of gold
puking backstage with my head in a toilet bowl
little girl right at home with the big ones
little girl writing songs about her feelings
little girl
little girl
hiding my soul inside my every word
to make sure my truth is never ever heard
except for by a bored fan with too much free time
and a passion for dissecting each and every line
little girl right at home with the big ones
little girl writing songs about her feelings
little girl
little girl
little girl right at home with the big ones
little girl writing songs about her feelings
little girl
little girl
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8. |
posters (indio, ca)
02:19
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she come down with a microphone as a wand to spellbind the world
guitar is her arcane focus through which she channels the earth
no tremble or stumble as she takes her place on the stage
through the power of music, baby, she'll take you to a new age
there i am in my flying colors, conducting the crowd
no such thing as too crazy today and no such thing as too loud
i'd play so great that heaven would hear me and the sky would swallow me up
but i can never reach it, yea, cause every time i wake up
i could stay there a million years but every time i wake up
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9. |
not home (wish i was)
03:05
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come late, out of my car
my house is so damn far
i'm at the party
some of my friends are here
other people are also here
i'm at the party
someone takes out a beer
do they know that i'm queer
i'm at the party
i see the sun go down
i only hang around
i'm at the party
i just want to be where my friends are right now
everybody's feelin' alright alright now
i will not remember tonight tonight now
and my chest is feeling so tight so tight now
i can't find my damn friends
this night just never ends
i'm at the party
someone takes the last beer
why the fuck am i here
this is a party
they're getting trashed tonight
can you just stand upright
this is a party
i wish i never came
'cause every one's the same
i cannot party
i just wish i knew where my friends are right now
(you came here of your free will)
i just want to feel alright alright now
(you know it's only your fault)
i will not remember tonight tonight now
(why can't you chill the fuck out)
and my head is feeling so light so light now
(why can't you calm the fuck down)
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10. |
||||
try to have fun but i
i am sorry but i
i cant have fun right now
waited for months and
spent four hundred on a suit
just to sit here alone
i shouldn't have come but i guess it can't be helped
it's too late now
the floor is so big and
there is room for me
but i can't stand up
i can't dance with a friend
there is room for us
but i fear the touch
you deserve someone better not some pasty fat fuckup
someone you love
don't say it's okay
i know it's not okay
i fucked up and i
can see it in your eyes
i'm ruining your night
don't lie
what kind of friend am i
to hide from your eyes
when i asked you here
cried in the bathroom
cried at our table
why the fuck am i here
your date is a failure, all she wants is to disappear
and not to hurt you
don't say it's okay
i know it's not okay
i fucked up and i
can see it in your eyes
i'm ruining your night
don't lie
leave me alone
stay far away
i'm just a let down
i'm not okay
all i ever do is hurt the ones i love
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11. |
mulan (old negatives)
11:30
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i always wondered how it would feel to live without a name
can i lose my own identity even for a day
turns out yes i can and now i drift along and pray
that one day i can get it back, don't want to disassociate
napoleon isn't half as short as the british say he is
it's just propaganda though i gotta hand it to them
cause now everyone thinks he's a dwarf instead of somewhat tall
goes to show that other people's words can make you feel so small
hey
can you see me
am i here at all
what's the point of being human when
i
cannot be
what i want to see
as a kid i just thought i was a body
and now
i am queer
this word is my home
and we've got to be okay and know that
(i've got something to get off my chest and something to put on
a cute skirt and a tank top i'm gonna blossom like a swan)
you can't tell me what to do
"Now the earth was formless and empty;
darkness was over the surface of the deep
and the spirit of God was hovering
over the waters."
and when god heard what we were doing
he wept for the state of his creation
so he sent forth the rains to slaughter
every soul in the nation
he said "noah yes i promise
to never wipe out all of you again"
every zealot who thinks they're so righteous
wishes they could be on that boat with him
although a nuke could be just as holy
it's a just war; it's just a war; it's just murder, just the truth
who gave you the right to trample
everyone who isn't you?
"there's no problem in killing a heathen"
says the crusader war hawk on the floor
"since through the bible god tells us:
'for god loveth not transgressors'"
stop and reconsider
where's the golden rule you held aloft in youth?
do you really think you get to decide
what exactly is god's truth?
when that war you launched on half the world
returns to you and knocks down your door
maybe you will start to wonder
just how much death is worth
is there any truth in this godforsaken place that i call home?
is there any help for a child who doesn't want to be alone?
when did growing up become a chore instead of a dream?
the moment i could understand that even god is mean
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12. |
in hindsight
04:55
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thought i was more than friends to you
you meant more than that meant more than that to me
and i hoped you would feel the same way
guess it wasn't meant to be
now i look like an idiot for
chasing a ghost heart, ghost heart
i thought it was mine, i thought when i looked your eyes
there was something
there's never a cure for the way that i feel
after starting to learn that my hopes were unreal
i knew it all along, didn't want to accept it
i'm mad at myself, i'm the one of us who kept it
alive, it was me i deluded myself
into believing you could want something crude as myself
i can't force my god damn feelings onto you
i spent all this time; what fucking good did it do? but
i'm done wasting my time
(i am taking my time)
done wasting my time
(taking my time)
with you
i am taking my time
taking my time
with you
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13. |
friends
05:21
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i woke up today
from a dream i've been living in
felt no weight on my chest
and i knew i was finished
so i carried on
knowing we were both livin'
even though you never knew
i felt like i'd been forgiven
something changed in my heart
guess that fire got put out
i never tried that much
it seems my love was not devout
so i carried on
like some Kerouac character
you were my Neal Cassady
once in a blue moon, you were close enough to touch
there's nothing wrong with "friends"
i think i've learned "friends" is enough
love was a fruitless venture
healthier to just give up
it was cruel of me
to always dream of having you
all along in my head
i guess i knew
[Simon Lane: There's a lesson to be learned here, ladies and gents: if you love someone - if you love someone, let them know.]
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